Men care about things, women care about people.
That’s the cliché, isn’t it?
Ah! You disagree? Because your Butler said so? Well, you’re wrong and so is your Butler.

You see, I actually have a grasp of how gender functions.
I assume you trust constructs like Non-Binary…
NB, after all, is simply the binary Other of—wait for it—binary.

And then comes the pronoun parade on LinkedIn.
He/him. She/her. They/them. Ze/zir. A whole grammatical cosplay convention nobody asked for.
An ideological infringement upon the English language itself, if you will.
Well then, what did you expect, He/her?
That’s absurd.

What you really wanted was your minority sexuality to be accepted by the majority.
When “they” shrugged and swiped left, you decided to go full demolition job on the very idea of gender identity.
My poor, weary “cisgender” arse feels terribly sorry for you.

Your paper-boat gender constructs? Built on puddles of deluded biology.
Wishful thinking, origami-folded in liberal sentiment.
Fawned over and peddled by the political left, not for you, dear, but for political mileage.

So no, I will not participate in your delusion.
I shall not buy your hypocrisy at MRP.
May you wade happily through your curated quirkiness.
For I already have enough quirks of mine own—organic, homegrown, farm-to-table.

No. Thank you, please.